When One Thing Leads to Another

It's always been a natural flow of things for us to know where to set up a new nursery for our babies.

When pregnant with T we had moved across the country from a 2-bedroom town home to a 4-bedroom house.  T's nursery was chosen and we still had a guest room and a spare guest room when we had multiple guests at once.

When pregnant with P we had moved back to the northwest and still had a 4-bedroom house (although we gave up 1,000 square feet w/ the move).  We had plenty of rooms for T and P to have their own room and still have a guest room.

Now, for the last few months we've been wrestling with where the new baby should go.  Do we give up the guest room and allow all 3 boys to have their own rooms?  If so, we've got to sell our nice guest room furniture, find a spot for my computer (and all my odds and ends), relo. the exercise bike and find a spot for our guests (much of the family lives out of state).

Do we bunk the older 2 boys together?  If so, we know that this will be a BATTLE at bedtime -- especially with P.  Knowing that my husband has to travel frequently with his new job, am I going to be able to take on the battle while adjusting to a newborn in our house?

There was not an easy solution.

A little over a week ago I simply mentioned to my dear (achiever) husband that I would love to begin picturing what I need to do to gear up for the new baby.  I should have known that he would not only help me make a decision but would MAKE IT HAPPEN RIGHT THEN!


Moments later, he was searching on-line for bunk beds.  The next morning, when the boys woke up, he excitedly told them that we would be going and getting bunk beds for their new room together.

We purchased the bunk bed and he assembled it immediately after.

I LOVE the fact that I can now begin the process of getting the baby's room in order now that P is relocated.  The boys LOVE the fact that they are together and in a bunk bed.

However...with all new things comes a learning curve.

I am really not sure who has had to learn more -- us as parents or them as kids!

Last week was really challenging at bedtime.

It was hard to go from the usual flow.  We would simply read a story, pray, give a hug and kiss and saying goodnight knowing that I would see them again about 12 hours later.  Now we were having to take away favorite stuffed animals from the kids for keeping each other up, etc.

It became exhausting.

For us all.

This morning, after another hard night last night, they once again woke up early.  My over-tired children had gone to bed late and woken before their bodies were fully ready...and GRUMPY as all get out!

After crying out in prayer and begging God to help me know what to do, a few hours later it came to me.

The boys are costing me (and of course my husband too) precious time in the evening to get things done, rest and have much needed downtime.

So, what is their acting up really costing them?

I am a huge believer in natural consequences with parenting when at all possible.  In this case, I sat the boys down tonight (after quickly/excitedly filling my husband in on this plan).  I tried to keep it simple.

They were taking time away from Mommy and Daddy's rest time at night.  They were also getting less sleep and were not able to play as well together during the day as a result.

I told them that tonight if they were going to take time to be silly at bedtime, Mommy would have to have them "give me back" that time tomorrow morning.

Instead of going to their favorite playground tomorrow morning they would each be spending time alone while Mommy used that time to rest or get the things done that I could not have tonight since I was in there having to discipline them.

T immediately got it.  P, well, I am not as sure.

The only thing I know is that they climbed into bed, we prayed and closed the door and there has not been even a peep since.

I know that this may have to be "put to the test" a few times for them to feel  the severity of it, but I am fully ready to "stick to it" -- even if it means I have to cancel our next morning plans (sorry in advance to all my dear friends and the play dates this may impact!) so that the boys can "pay me back my time lost".

Summertime works perfectly to do this since we've got a much more flexible schedule in the mornings.

By fall, I hope that they would know we mean business and that it works much better to follow the guidelines than pay with consequences later.

I'll try to give a report in the next several days as to the success of the mission: "Operation Take Back the Evening"!