This cute smile has not been seen much around here this week.This past week has been a bit challenging. The down pour coming from the weaning of our little one and his BELOVED pacifier. I wanted SO much to report that everything had gone beautifully and that there were absolutely no problems whatsoever.
I am now forced to swallow my pride -- it does not taste good. I pride myself on trying SO hard to be consistent with my boys -- not giving in to whining, complaining, etc.
This could have been one of those stories about me "sticking to my guns" and "riding it out". Instead I am here reporting that as of this morning, after trying for a week, P now has his pacifier again.
Putting down our 2 year old this week seemed almost impossible! He had begun in the past few days to get really anxious at bedtimes when I would finally get him calmed down, only to have to go back in to calm him down over and over each night. He's been waking up a lot earlier in the mornings, barely nap in the afternoons, (if at all), and then be up in the middle of the night with night terrors, (some nights multiple times). It was WAY too much, (for us both). To make matters worse, my husband has had many late nights at work lately.
I can honestly say that I don't know who's more exhausted of the 2 of us.
Last night, after he just would not settle down, my husband asked me the question: Why right now?
I thought for a long time and then realized that I could not answer because I did not really know. I was so inspired by my sister-in-law and her amazing success with our nephew recently, I just assumed that it would be the same.
Then of course I begin wondering what I did wrong -- what could I have done better? I also know that some people look down on me as a parent because I have a 2 year old that still has a pacifier when sleeping. I must not be a strong person to "stick it out".
But, I just can't worry about what other people think, (a lifetime battle I fight).
After seeing my little boy growing more and more anxious about going to bed and then not even sleeping well when he did fall asleep, I decided, (with my husband's blessing), that we would try weaning again in a little while. And I am determined that next time he and I will both be ready and thus making it a successful attempt, (and actually GET RID of them).
I know that many people would have done this differently, however, I do feel a peace about this at this time...(and that he fell asleep calmly and instantly for the first time in many days tonight).
In the grand scheme of things this will not matter, (thank the Lord!), but at this moment and for this week, it has been ALL consuming.
Thankfully, I know that it will all work out just fine...I just need to keep reminding myself of that very fact.
9 comments:
He won't still have it when he's 16... you can bet on that! :) I too struggle with this although Luke turns 3 in October and still has his at bedtime. Not sure when we'll take his away but for now, it's his. Don't be hard on yourself, sounds like the timing just wasn't right and there's no reason for worrying about that. No reason for him to be anxious and for you to have sleepless nights. The right time will come for the both of you! I completely understand wanting to get rid of it, I struggle with the same thing but at the same time, in the end, I've decided not to fight that battle right now. I think we may be getting very close, just not quite there yet! Good luck, and I'm glad you now have a happy sleeper back... and remember, the time will come, I've never seen a 16 year old with a binkie! :)
:) Thank you, dear Sarah! I needed that!
Oh my goodness, how could this happen……! Just kidding…. :) Hey Mom, Grandpa Jack says, binkie at bedtime is like this wonderful weather we have been enjoying…it too will pass…Mr P. can nap at my campfire anytime….
Oh my goodness sweet Julie Anne, do not be hard on yourself. You are so right in that there's no pressing reason to have it gone right now (like no baby coming in Dec!), and if it's making life so crazy miserable, I don't think I would have stuck it out. Paci or no paci, you're an amazing mom!
If it makes you feel any better - we had a failed paci intervention at our house too.
Chase is way too attached to his paci DURING THE DAY to the point where I began to worry about his speech development. So he just turned 18 months old and I thought, "Brillant, let's get rid of paci during the day and he can have it only at bedtimes".
Yeah, right. The ALL DAY SCREAMING could be heard at neighbor's houses. I'm not kidding - they called and asked.
Then he came down with a cold today and I simply gave in. He has that stupid thing attached to his face again.
However, I do have a tried and true method for giving up paci once and for all. I did it with both of the older boys. It was tough the first few days, but after that - no problem. I don't attempt it until their second birthdays, so I figure I have six more months (although they weren't as attached during the day as my youngest one). So when you are ready, I do have a good method for giving it up for good. Contact me when ready :)
Wow, such a hard decision to make. In the end, you were able to step back from the situation and see that maybe the end wasn't worth the means just yet. Pride is hard to swallow, but no one thinks any less of you. It is hard to change our minds as moms sometimes. But sometimes it is just the right thing to do.
No worries, Sadie had her binkie until after she was 3. We finally mailed them to her Uncle Nik. It was sad for her, but she was at an appropriate age to want to be "big" and to be able to give it up. You will know when the time is right. You are a wonderful mom!
Thank you SO MUCH for all your amazing encouragement and beautiful words of affirmation!
You've all given me the boost that I was in desperate need of.
I can not thank you enough for taking the time write me a note! :)
Good choice to put it off for later, in my opinion. Love you and pray for better rest.
What a pain!!! They are a lifesaver when they are little babies but become such a nuisance when they get older... Good luck when you try it again. We cut off the tip of Brittany's and she noticed immediately. We told her the doggie got it. We got so lucky because she said it was broken and didn't want it anymore... Every time she asked for it the next couple of days we reminded her that the doggie got it and she whined a little but then settled down and was okay. She was 21 months and we were very blessed that it was such an easy transition. I'm sending good thoughts your way.
The only concern for me was that the dentist scared me about her bite being off or needing braces if she used it for too long... Just food for thought:)
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